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When Raven went down the stairs, it was more like dropping in to the damn rabbit hole and, more specifically, Holiday Hell. Every single Bird of Prey was wearing the fucking ugliest sweaters ever. By that, he didn’t mean just ugly, but that those things were so bad not even the most desperate homeless person would have accepted them. Never before had he seen so much fluff, glitter, fringe, and sequins in his life. They could have put any child beauty pageant to shame. All that was missing were the hyped up kids and the screaming mothers. Blood Demons never scared him more than the sight of his fellow brothers getting in the spirit of the season.
Even Night, their serious, mighty, fearless warrior-leader, who had faced death and laughed numerous times, was sporting a blue snowflake sweater with a smiling polar bear on on the front. Really, their ruler? Their head honcho? Their numero uno? Their big cheese? If the gods could only see this, they would all be fired. Well, if they weren’t thrown in a vat of boiling oil first. Raven hated it when that happened. It took weeks for him to get that gunk out of his hair.
Fallon leaned over and whispered in his ear, “Did I say ten minutes? Let’s get the fuck out of here now. I think I see fruitcake over there. What if they try to make us eat it? We’ll never be the same again.”
Fruitcake! Dear gods, no. The last time they made Raven eat that sticky, too-sweet concoction, he had to go to the dentist to get the goo out of his teeth. He was not about to go through that again. Raven was about to run back up the stairs when Sebastian approached them holding two hideous looking red sweaters. “Here you go, guys.”
“Fuck no. I would rather be strung up and whipped for two straight days than wear those.” Fallon swatted at the sweaters, making Sebastian drop them.
Sebastian bent over and roughly scooped them up again. “Hey! Put them on.”
Raven broke out in a sweat when he saw that they had matching snowmen on the front. Well, they were almost matching. One of them had a black top hat, while the other wore tree-branches that were fashioned to look like antlers. Both of the snowballed characters had the same goofy smiles and big-eyed expression. They reminded Raven of the humans they came across who were high on ecstasy. That wasn’t the worst part, though, if one could believe it. The most offensive thing was the multicolored lights that blinked on them. It was as if Sebastian had gone out of his way to find the worst sweaters and put them aside for Raven and Fallon.
Raven gave an adamant shake of his head. Even if Fallon hadn’t been there, he still wouldn’t have touched those things with a ten-foot pole. “Hell no.”
Wren came over and stood behind Sebastian wearing a dark green sweater with a Santa Claus on it. Damn, damn, damn, could it get any worse? “Should we have gone leather, since we know that’s all you two ever wear? Take a day off the cowhide, put one of these on, and shut up. It’s dinner time, and David and Night have been working hard on it.” Wren grabbed a red sweater out of Sebastian’s hand and threw it at Raven’s face.
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